"I'm not afraid to take a stand....."! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this article that my sister forwarded to me ~ a bit loose on the language ~ but such a great "Mother" message!
http://adequateparenting.com/?p=393
The following is my response:
This is not my personal parenting choice obviously because I am a stay at home Mom, but what I am against is this idea that there are "right" and "wrong" ways to get pregnant, give birth, feed and otherwise parent your children. Why can't we all just be in one, big, happy, supportive "Mama" group. I WANT and NEED other Mommy's to be there for me, encourage me, tell me when I have made a mistake (lovingly) and how to correct it (also lovingly, please). I want to make choices that are right FOR ME and my family without backlash from "well-meaning" Moms that have it all figured out. Competive mothering is not a option for me. I DON'T care if you had an epidural during delivery (I did it both ways), but I DO care if you teach your children to be kind and respectful members of society. I DON'T care if you nursed or bottle-fed (I nursed three and bottle fed one) or for how long ( I did it for a length of time that I enjoyed) but I DO care that you feed your kiddos. I also care that you love them and nourish their brains, I care that you teach them to love one another and be tolerant of differences!
A word of caution now; if you are a Mom (or Dad) that feels the need to tell me that I should have given birth at home or that I should not vaccinate or that I should only home-school, or any number of societies' long held stigmas on "right" parenting, please be prepared to hear an opposing (but polite) difference of opinion. Followed by a kind (but firm) piece of advice. Please don't stand in front of me and spout about how you did it "right" and I did it "wrong". IT IS NOT A COMPETITION!!!!! (Repeat that!) It just doesn't matter! I have already given birth (at a hospital), and nursed my babies in public (gasp) and it's too late! All you are contending to do is make me feel bad about the choices I have made! I'm very competitive, but I just don't like this sport, quite franky! And another thing, my kids will survive me, despite the way I have birthed, fed, spanked, disciplined and loved them and yours will survive you, too; we are the only Mama's they have!
That said, everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if you are a home-birth, midwife having, "granola" mother or a junk-food feeding, video game playing Mama, go on with your bad self and do it proudly!!! I respect your choices and I adore that you brought your sweet lovies into the world! We all need to calm down a bit! After all, some of our Grandparents (and maybe even parents) were birthed at home, no epidural, fed cows milk that was directly from the cow, didn't go to school past 5th grade (or not at all) and they turned out to be great people!!! Remember that it truly does take a village and in the long term, it's just not all that important!
I absolutely LOVE this post today. I totally agree. Each child/family/situation is unique and nobody else can judge another's ways. What works for me and my kids might not work for others. How often do we as mother have to change how we deal with our own kids. Like, I might have to spank one to get their attention, but another one I can look at sternly and they burst into tears knowing the've done wrong. :) Thanks so much your honestly as we all support each other in our endeavors to raise our children to be happy, healthy, productive members of society, no matter how the journey was to get there!!!
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